Well we are back in full effect for this school year and it has been hectic. I find that one of the hardest things of being a special needs parent is wonder if what you are doing is enough and if I am making the right decisions. I have found myself in a spot lately where I am second guessing myself and the decisions we have made for Adrian. I can't help and look at him and wonder what the future holds for him will he ever speak, will he be independent and do things on his own. Will he need constant supervision, he will he be able to defend himself in a world that is so cruel and cold hearted. And my answer to this is I do not know we are trying to bring him up to do all these things but at the end God only knows. And I have to grab onto God to help us on a daily basis to get thru daily. I never knew how hurtful people could be until my son was diagnosed with ASD. And what parents go thru on a daily basis as a mom I feel the hurt, I feel the stares, the judgements and sometimes even the comments. And even though we treat our son like his siblings and like any other child sometimes we will refrain of going places because it's just better to be in our safe zone then having to confront, see or hear what others have to say. But no matter what God has given us a reassurance that he is control and I can't help but remember the following verse "Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth." Psalms 46:10. To those parents who have felt the same things that I have felt know that you are not alone. Some days may be harder then others but know that we have been chosen to be a parent of a special child and in spite of how our child is they are teaching us something that we would have never learned if they were our typical child.